Just what this country needs, another tree-planting ceremony in
honor of dead Americans.

Another fly-by from the air-force, another German tourist eating
bad shawarma, another commentary on the taxi drivers.

Another insightful political analysis, another study of
demographics, another home for the aged, school for the blind,
cafe for the Lesbians.

Just what this country needs, another fat, ignorant Floridian
tourist, imagining that he is walking in Abraham's footsteps,
another half-deformed hook-nosed caricature, foaming at the
mouth, reaching for his luggage; a dreadful spinster tour-guide
versed in architectural geography, chainsmoking cheap cigarettes.

Another Bible Code.

Just what this country needs, another two-bit hustling import-
export specialist originally from Miami, with political ideas
from the transliteration of Mein Kampf and a wardrobe custom-
tailored to last year's idea of nouveau riche.

Just what this country needs, another messianic militant,
agitating people who somehow can't get laid. Another miracle.

Another crying left-wing sunflower-muncher, pitying the
Palestinian children not out of some sense of having investigated
human suffering but rather because as a child, she didn't get the
intimacy she so desperately craved,

Another Rabbi for Human Rights,, protecting precious illusions of
universal love from the bad karma caused by the fact that these
people hate you, and with good reason.

Just what this country needs, another deadwrong Anglo know-it-
all, fresh from pre-Mandela South Africa, ready to advise on how
these raghead keffers should be dealt with properly.

Just what this country needs, another comedian in a toupee,
another line at the post-office, another laundromat that doesn't
give change, another long-distance phone company, another bypass
road.

Just what this country needs, another Russian success story,
another Ethiopian victimized by race, another soldier killed in
Lebanon, another intern for peace, another traffic circle in
Jerusalem, another Western Wall, another ancient Jewish
gravesite, another massive wedding of the scion of a Hasidic
dynasty, another monument to the space shuttle, another
monoculture forest, another beautiful sunset.

Just what this country needs, another rosy schoolchild
delightfully reciting the Hebrew alphabet with no discernible
accent.

Just what this country needs, more peace and love, more ahava
v'achva, more shabbat shalom and shavua tov, bread and wine, salt
and zatar, kibbutznikim and tsfoniim, Arutz Sheva and Shalom
Achshav. 

Just what this country needs, decent toilet paper and Pizza Hut
at last!, after all these years.

Another brain-dead bitter accountant who wants to call himself a
poet, another insane Evangelical Christian wading in the Jordan,
another wall-defacing punk Israeli, born-again Baal Tshuva,
another retiree fleeing New Jersey, survivor of Europe's
holocaust, former prisoner of conscience, powerful elder of Zion,
old man of Tzfat, another shameless victim of persecution.

Another misty-eyed, frosty-haired late-teen Jewess, embracing
traditional texts in a supportive setting, perhaps to find a
husband, perhaps to wrestle with her ancestors, perhaps to be a
poster child, perhaps to volunteer at Yad Sarah, perhaps to stay
forever, perhaps to witness a bomb blow up, perhaps to watch TV,
possibly to get a degree, maybe to consider the Rabbinate, efshar
gam to take a trip to Petra, ulai a visit to Los Pyramidos, lamah
lo a quick dip in the Med, all the while Wrestling, Striving,
Seeking in matching black corderouys, in hand-woven scarves, in
Moroccan-braided hair, in uncomfortable furniture, in various
poorly-heated rooms, in cities contested by negotiators, in a
country the size of Philadelphia.

Another sixteen year old visitor from Florida tasting his first
beer and laughing -- duuude--  another child finding meaning in
old hills, another worried mom back home, fretting over newspaper
reports of falling governments and rising tensions, worrying,
coping, wondering - when should I have stopped? when did the
half-truths I taught pile up too high and lead to --this?

Just what this country needs, another nationalist.

Just what this country needs, a lotto winner from Budapest.

Just what this country needs, a monorail.  A mall.

Just what this country needs, someone with some compassion.  A
festival of American food, a microbrew, a fat child, a new war.

Just what this country needs, a regular guy who just happens to
carry a semi-automatic rifle.

Just what this country needs, a third way.

Just what this country needs, Moloch: a six-lane highway from
Haifa to Beersheva, an airport in Gaza City, an artist's colony
in Arab houses, a center for dialogue between secular and
religious, a wine bar, a horoscope column in the newspaper, a
seaside promenade, a new barrier in front of Rachel's Tomb,
comfortable housing for overseas students, closures, pathways to
the future, marches of the living, birthrights and human rights,
a badly transliterated movie, gritty realism, a technology
company, a mikve, a Kosher McDonalds.

Just what this country needs, a winning soccer team, quiet,
peace, and better beer.